Surrounded in ambiguity I laugh forcefully. Create rather than look for moments that will relish me or bring comfort to my mind and soul. I need to busy myself in order to overcome the frustrating ambiguity. Perhaps, its nostalgia or perhaps I’m being punished for some immodest act. As they say, restlessness is a curse. Yes, it is ‘restlessness’, a disease that snatches away peace and sleep of many. ‘’Ask for forgiveness,’’ they said. Oh! I wailed and pleaded, grew tired, yet again lifted my hands for forgiveness. It’s a bitter curse, laughing with uncertainty; without reason without love and even without hate! 

Again circled around nostalgic and with every breath a memory flashes in my head leaving a unique smile across my face. I call it ‘unique’ because it carries happiness and sadness side by side. What would things be like with those same people around me? Beautiful or easy I guess. Or perhaps everything happens for a reason; reasons that we can’t see or think of. Is this separation a blessing in disguise? Or is it a test? I believe the fact that one can’t get everything they desire. Life doesn't come with a complete package nor does it come with a plan. I pray for happiness; which is being surrounded by those set of people with whom you have fallen in love with. This is my idea of ‘love’. I regret the fact that I couldn't open my heart out completely to anyone of them; the declaration was not sufficed. So much had to be said, so many hugs and kisses had to be given and so many vows to be declared.